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    #31
    I have heard coaches being arseholes. Yelling out at a chubby kid especially a girl...hey you should not let her beat you to the ball do you see how big she is....I apologized to other team for my club's coach, told the coach to his face if he ever did that again I would be in the phone with ice (overseas guy) and he would get a visit at a practice. I sent letter to doc. He stopped in front of me but was/is still an arse. My family left club after season.

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      #32
      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
      I didn't say that women coaches would be a total solution, but I question why you don't think more women coaches could be part of a solution. I think more women coaches along the way could benefit girls that clearly deal with a lot more than boys do, beyond soccer.

      As for male coaches shutting down the BS, I don't see it happening. Many don't see it, ignore it, or make it worse.
      I don't see the qualities of being a good coach or specifically being to handle bullying germane to a gender. It's the person not the gender. I understand that woman were once little girls and may have experienced similar and on the surface I see the logic leap your making. However, when they were little girls we have no idea which role they played. The bullied, silent observer, a leader who stands up for the bullied, or the bully. The one you want coaching or dealing with this issue IMO is the leader, encouraging the girls who maybe be thinking of standing up to stand up, becasue you don't hear everything or observe the off the field stuff, as as discouraging, stopping the bullying you personally see. Those qualities are human qualities not gender based qualities. I've seen plenty of adults of both genders that I don't want coaching my kids.

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        #33
        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
        I have heard coaches being arseholes. Yelling out at a chubby kid especially a girl...hey you should not let her beat you to the ball do you see how big she is....I apologized to other team for my club's coach, told the coach to his face if he ever did that again I would be in the phone with ice (overseas guy) and he would get a visit at a practice. I sent letter to doc. He stopped in front of me but was/is still an arse. My family left club after season.
        Good for you. Don’t slip on the ICE.
        But back on point...do you realize that the majority of coaches in these age groups are young and inexperienced in many aspects?
        I would prefer to not have them weigh in on off-field issues as they continue to grapple with their own.
        The older, more experienced life nuanced coaches are not coaching at these levels, with very few exceptions

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          #34
          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
          I don't see the qualities of being a good coach or specifically being to handle bullying germane to a gender. It's the person not the gender. I understand that woman were once little girls and may have experienced similar and on the surface I see the logic leap your making. However, when they were little girls we have no idea which role they played. The bullied, silent observer, a leader who stands up for the bullied, or the bully. The one you want coaching or dealing with this issue IMO is the leader, encouraging the girls who maybe be thinking of standing up to stand up, becasue you don't hear everything or observe the off the field stuff, as as discouraging, stopping the bullying you personally see. Those qualities are human qualities not gender based qualities. I've seen plenty of adults of both genders that I don't want coaching my kids.
          Sorry but women - overall - are more in tune with emotions and the feelings of others and tend to be more empathetic. Men - overall - are often clueless. However, for a woman to make it in coaching you have to be pretty tough.

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            #35
            Soccer is not an individual sport. If you can't handle issues like this that directly impact a team, then I recommend that you further your coaching education. These issues occur in both boys and girls soccer, but it is more prevalent on the girl's side. Anyone working in the business would agree with that. Acting like you can go out and teach soccer only amounts to only one aspect of building a team.

            My opinion is that female coaches would not be afraid to tackle this type of issue on a girl's soccer team. They could also provide more support to girls and what they go through as part of the maturation process. As I said before, I'd like to see more in club soccer. Not many at the bigger clubs.

            Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
            I don't see the qualities of being a good coach or specifically being to handle bullying germane to a gender. It's the person not the gender. I understand that woman were once little girls and may have experienced similar and on the surface I see the logic leap your making. However, when they were little girls we have no idea which role they played. The bullied, silent observer, a leader who stands up for the bullied, or the bully. The one you want coaching or dealing with this issue IMO is the leader, encouraging the girls who maybe be thinking of standing up to stand up, becasue you don't hear everything or observe the off the field stuff, as as discouraging, stopping the bullying you personally see. Those qualities are human qualities not gender based qualities. I've seen plenty of adults of both genders that I don't want coaching my kids.

            Comment


              #36
              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
              Sorry but women - overall - are more in tune with emotions and the feelings of others and tend to be more empathetic. Men - overall - are often clueless. However, for a woman to make it in coaching you have to be pretty tough.
              I'm not going to feed the internet troll, I'm not going to feed the internet troll, I'm not going to feed the internet troll....I'm not.....aaargh.. this comment is as stupid as it it is sexist. Your not qualified to judge a gender, Nobody is... I'm not going to feed the internet troll ....anymore

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                #37
                Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                I'm not going to feed the internet troll, I'm not going to feed the internet troll, I'm not going to feed the internet troll....I'm not.....aaargh.. this comment is as stupid as it it is sexist. Your not qualified to judge a gender, Nobody is... I'm not going to feed the internet troll ....anymore
                Men and women have different brains and process emotions differently, (even the same emotions). Women are much more likely to empathize while men systematize.
                #sciencematters

                https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/b...ally-emotional

                https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/...n_6510160.html

                https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5784910/

                https://www.livescience.com/61987-em...women-men.html

                https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/b...omen-empathize

                https://stanmed.stanford.edu/2017spr...different.html

                https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/b...etween-genders

                Comment


                  #38
                  Of course science matters. Truth is the tuth. Call an apple a banana till kingdom come and the apple will just continue to be an apple.

                  Comment


                    #39
                    Wonderful, there are differences between men and women. Noone is debating that. However, people who decide to coach are a small subsection of each gender, and amoung those based on my relevant real life experience with 3 daughters who've played multiple sports with both gender coaches guessing close to 20 different coaches and countless hours observing them in action is that the gender doesn't matter but the qualities that particular human does matter. We prefer to have our daughters work with the best coaches without regard to this silly sexism. My kids have had positive and negative experience with both genders in regards. More women coaches is lazy and is not THE answer, same is an The answer isn't to prefer Male coaches. It's to find high quality people regardless of gender for your kids to be coached by and surrounded by. And if you are a coach to be a high quality person and influence those you coach. Good luck to you

                    Comment


                      #40
                      What you're missing is that clubs are not hiring women coaches. How many are at NEFC, FC Stars, GPS, etc.? Probably less than 10 combined. I do think it is a problem, and I do believe more women coaches would be a positive for youth soccer.

                      How many women coaches are coaching boys teams? Zero?



                      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                      Wonderful, there are differences between men and women. Noone is debating that. However, people who decide to coach are a small subsection of each gender, and amoung those based on my relevant real life experience with 3 daughters who've played multiple sports with both gender coaches guessing close to 20 different coaches and countless hours observing them in action is that the gender doesn't matter but the qualities that particular human does matter. We prefer to have our daughters work with the best coaches without regard to this silly sexism. My kids have had positive and negative experience with both genders in regards. More women coaches is lazy and is not THE answer, same is an The answer isn't to prefer Male coaches. It's to find high quality people regardless of gender for your kids to be coached by and surrounded by. And if you are a coach to be a high quality person and influence those you coach. Good luck to you

                      Comment


                        #41
                        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                        I'm not going to feed the internet troll, I'm not going to feed the internet troll, I'm not going to feed the internet troll....I'm not.....aaargh.. this comment is as stupid as it it is sexist. Your not qualified to judge a gender, Nobody is... I'm not going to feed the internet troll ....anymore
                        Worst coach I ever saw was a woman.
                        Mean, nasty and sarcastic all the time.
                        But she won and everyone loved her.
                        And no posts on ts about her either.

                        Comment


                          #42
                          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                          Worst coach I ever saw was a woman.
                          Mean, nasty and sarcastic all the time.
                          But she won and everyone loved her.
                          And no posts on ts about her either.
                          “Mean, nasty and sarcastic all the time”
                          Looks like you found my ex-wife

                          Comment


                            #43
                            Many male coaches either aren't aware of the little clicky things that go one or feel like it isn't their job to deal. They are there to coach and that's it.

                            As a female who has coached, I notice all the social dynamics even if I don't want to and I think that it is part of my job to do whatever I can to create good humans not just good players.

                            Yes great team dynamics can lead to great things. I have seen it in both sports my kid plays. She has had one team in each sport that was truly special in terms of how the kids interacted and both those teams were the most successful she has ever played on (so far).

                            She's been on teams with witchy players, she sees it, finds it annoying, then ignores it and plays.

                            Comment


                              #44
                              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                              What you're missing is that clubs are not hiring women coaches. How many are at NEFC, FC Stars, GPS, etc.? Probably less than 10 combined. I do think it is a problem, and I do believe more women coaches would be a positive for youth soccer.

                              How many women coaches are coaching boys teams? Zero?
                              Because club soccer is an incestuous "old boys club" where coaches use their relationships to further their career to the general exclusion of women. The number one question you should ask yourself is "How many female DoC's are there in the local club soccer landscape? One, LL at SSS and that is because she runs the club and it was started as a family business. GPS, NEFC, FC Stars, etc all have zero female DoC's. There is no career advancement in club soccer for women. Most coaches realize that and move on fairly quickly. The smart ones who want to continue to coach go with HS or College.

                              Comment


                                #45
                                Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                                Because club soccer is an incestuous "old boys club" where coaches use their relationships to further their career to the general exclusion of women. The number one question you should ask yourself is "How many female DoC's are there in the local club soccer landscape? One, LL at SSS and that is because she runs the club and it was started as a family business. GPS, NEFC, FC Stars, etc all have zero female DoC's. There is no career advancement in club soccer for women. Most coaches realize that and move on fairly quickly. The smart ones who want to continue to coach go with HS or College.
                                Top it off with the fact that it isn't an easy career for a woman who has a family. Moms still do most of the heavy lifting in family lives. Late nights and weekends spent on the fields isn't very conducive to raising young kids unless yours spouse has a very flexible schedule. Many male coaches get divorced or leave the field as well for something with a more predictable schedule. Every female club coach I knew ten years ago has moved on from club - college coaches, HS coaches + another job, or two not coaching at all.

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