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Rules of Talking Soccer

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    Rules of Talking Soccer

    1. People who post about the virtues of skilled players think they have one.
    2. People who post about the virtues of athletic players think they have one.
    3. People who float theories about candidates for coaching jobs are the candidates.
    4. Everyone thinks they're Jurgen or better.
    5. Excuses for one club are violations of another.
    6. Close games are only telling when it's your kid's club.
    7. Everyone's kid can play D1 at the school of his/her choice.
    8. The crazies are limited to other clubs, not your kid's.
    9. Informational postings are free advertisements.
    10. Posters' kids are the best, game changers, superstars, but have been overlooked and under-appreciated.
    11. NT invites are useless if your kid didn't get one.
    12. Id opportunities go to undeserving kids.
    13. Listing of kids' initials is by a parent of one of them.
    14. Every club other than your kid's is unprofessional, violates league rules, and fails to develop great players.
    15. Winners of polls of clubs and schools correlate with the number of posters from those clubs and schools.
    16. Postings should be made to run clubs into the ground.
    17. Critical postings of clubs are from parents of kids who were cut or couldn't make the team or see rule 16.
    18. Everyone is an expert on other clubs.
    19. Losses are never because your kid's team was not as good.
    20. Goals for are spectacular; goals against are flukes.
    21. Be cruel and unprofessional at all times about kids of all ages because it is an anonymous board.

    And this is why no board should be anonymous.

    #2
    Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
    1. People who post about the virtues of skilled players think they have one.
    2. People who post about the virtues of athletic players think they have one.
    3. People who float theories about candidates for coaching jobs are the candidates.
    4. Everyone thinks they're Jurgen or better.
    5. Excuses for one club are violations of another.
    6. Close games are only telling when it's your kid's club.
    7. Everyone's kid can play D1 at the school of his/her choice.
    8. The crazies are limited to other clubs, not your kid's.
    9. Informational postings are free advertisements.
    10. Posters' kids are the best, game changers, superstars, but have been overlooked and under-appreciated.
    11. NT invites are useless if your kid didn't get one.
    12. Id opportunities go to undeserving kids.
    13. Listing of kids' initials is by a parent of one of them.
    14. Every club other than your kid's is unprofessional, violates league rules, and fails to develop great players.
    15. Winners of polls of clubs and schools correlate with the number of posters from those clubs and schools.
    16. Postings should be made to run clubs into the ground.
    17. Critical postings of clubs are from parents of kids who were cut or couldn't make the team or see rule 16.
    18. Everyone is an expert on other clubs.
    19. Losses are never because your kid's team was not as good.
    20. Goals for are spectacular; goals against are flukes.
    21. Be cruel and unprofessional at all times about kids of all ages because it is an anonymous board.

    And this is why no board should be anonymous.
    Man, I would hate to live in your house. The fact that you thought all of this through is kinda scarey. It means you are way too obsessed with everything soccer related. Your kid must have been jipped at one point, or maybe you were. Definitely have some baggage though.

    Comment


      #3
      I think it's funny. We have to laugh at ourselves, and I think you might have demonstrated a rule.

      Comment


        #4
        22. Anybody who plays for a club team is wasting their money
        23. Anybody who doesn't play for a club team is wasting their time.

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
          1. People who post about the virtues of skilled players think they have one.
          2. People who post about the virtues of athletic players think they have one.
          3. People who float theories about candidates for coaching jobs are the candidates.
          4. Everyone thinks they're Jurgen or better.
          5. Excuses for one club are violations of another.
          6. Close games are only telling when it's your kid's club.
          7. Everyone's kid can play D1 at the school of his/her choice.
          8. The crazies are limited to other clubs, not your kid's.
          9. Informational postings are free advertisements.
          10. Posters' kids are the best, game changers, superstars, but have been overlooked and under-appreciated.
          11. NT invites are useless if your kid didn't get one.
          12. Id opportunities go to undeserving kids.
          13. Listing of kids' initials is by a parent of one of them.
          14. Every club other than your kid's is unprofessional, violates league rules, and fails to develop great players.
          15. Winners of polls of clubs and schools correlate with the number of posters from those clubs and schools.
          16. Postings should be made to run clubs into the ground.
          17. Critical postings of clubs are from parents of kids who were cut or couldn't make the team or see rule 16.
          18. Everyone is an expert on other clubs.
          19. Losses are never because your kid's team was not as good.
          20. Goals for are spectacular; goals against are flukes.
          21. Be cruel and unprofessional at all times about kids of all ages because it is an anonymous board.

          And this is why no board should be anonymous.

          wow- full of absolutes- no shades of grey? which one are you Dumb or Dumber?

          Comment


            #6
            24. All refs suck and don't know what they're doing. I could do a better job (but won't because I'm a lazy SOB)

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by Unregistered
              24. All refs suck and don't know what they're doing. I could do a better job (but won't because I'm a lazy SOB)
              25. Anyone who doesn't agree with a post is dumb or a terrible parent.

              Comment


                #8
                26. I'm a much better poster than anyone else on this board.
                27. I have all the answers
                28. My/my kid's experience is representative of everyone else's

                Comment


                  #9
                  26. I'm a much better parent than anyone else on this board.
                  27. I have all the answers
                  28. My/my kid's experience is representative of everyone else's[/QUOTE]

                  sorry had to fix it

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Huh. My kid's in high school, gave up club soccer, starts on varsity, has decent speed but great size. Her mission is just to clobber. That's it. Clobber the ball down field or out of bounds. Clobber the free kick from 25 yards out. Clobber your NPL soccer player into the ground. Clobber. And, she's good at it.

                    And, after soccer season is over, there's no driving all over Creation for club games.

                    That's called winning.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                      Man, I would hate to live in your house. The fact that you thought all of this through is kinda scarey. It means you are way too obsessed with everything soccer related. Your kid must have been jipped at one point, or maybe you were. Definitely have some baggage though.
                      You got gypped in your English classes growing up. Kinda scary.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                        Huh. My kid's in high school, gave up club soccer, starts on varsity, has decent speed but great size. Her mission is just to clobber. That's it. Clobber the ball down field or out of bounds. Clobber the free kick from 25 yards out. Clobber your NPL soccer player into the ground. Clobber. And, she's good at it.

                        And, after soccer season is over, there's no driving all over Creation for club games.

                        That's called winning.
                        So's going to college for free. And not having a kid who weighs 185 lbs and will be a bouncer in 3 years..

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                          Huh. My kid's in high school, gave up club soccer, starts on varsity, has decent speed but great size. Her mission is just to clobber. That's it. Clobber the ball down field or out of bounds. Clobber the free kick from 25 yards out. Clobber your NPL soccer player into the ground. Clobber. And, she's good at it.

                          And, after soccer season is over, there's no driving all over Creation for club games.

                          That's called winning.
                          That's nice, dad. Until she meets a player that played much more games than your
                          kid and knows how to deal bruisers like your kid. Knows how to foul and inflict pain
                          without getting caught. Knows how to unbalance big fat girls and make them fall down.
                          The more angry you daughter gets and out of control, the worst it is for her.
                          You know why? That's her job and she is very good at it. To protect her teammates from bruisers like your daughter, until she stops or leaves the field hobbled. Watch for her.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Boy, some of you missed out when they were handing out the sarcasm meter...

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                              Boy, some of you missed out when they were handing out the sarcasm meter...
                              This ^^^^^
                              With the exception of the people who take exception, these posts are brilliant

                              Comment

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